Better Health & Living

Staying Balanced
Home > family > caregiving > Staying Balanced

Staying Balanced

How you can better juggle work and caregiving responsibilities

by Linda Rao

Published Dec 2006 in family •caregiving | 0 Comments, Talk about this article »

Question:

I work full-time and care for my aging aunt, who lives with me. Not only is my job performance starting to suffer, I feel like I have no social life. And I’m only 30 years old!

Answer:

“We’re seeing an increase in the percentage of men and women under age 35 who are involved in eldercare,” says social gerontologist Donna Wagner, PhD, of Towson University in Towson, Maryland. “Younger workers are much more vulnerable to the conflicts between work and family, because they’re shaping their careers, while raising their own families.” 

Wagner recalls a 30-year-old woman in the Midwest who flew back to New Jersey every two weeks to care for her grandmother. “Caregiving had fallen to the younger woman because her mother and grandmother weren’t speaking, even though they lived close to each other,” she says. The woman had to put her dating and social activities on hold because her grandmother’s care took up so much of her time.

In fact, working caregivers tend to miss out on all kinds of leisure activities, no matter what their age. “People who try to balance work and caregiving tend not to take vacations except to caregive,” Wagner says. “They also miss out on spending time with friends.” And with 62% of caregivers employed full-time or part-time, that’s a lot of missed vacations.

Caregiving doesn’t just take a toll on your social life: Studies conducted by the MetLife Insurance and National Alliance for Caregiving (NAC) found that 10% of family caregivers take early retirement or quit their jobs, 11% take a leave of absence, and 7% reduce their work hours. “Caregiving may also negatively affect their career choices,” Wagner says. Indeed, the MetLife and NAC studies also found that 3% of workers turn down promotions because of their caregiving responsibilities.

Whether you care for a family member nearby or one far away seems to have little impact on the amount of stress you feel. “If you’re caring at a distance, you worry about what’s happening while you’re at work. If you care for someone locally, you spend your lunch hour checking up on them,” Wagner says. “And though you may think moving your parent closer will make your life simpler, it actually increases the likelihood that you’ll need to take unpaid leave, miss a lot of work, or quit altogether.”

Wagner says some employed caregivers experience reduced “presenteeism”—the ability to focus and be “present” at work. “Reduced presenteeism, related to the stress of caregiving, may result in making mistakes at work, using work to arrange services, and seeking support from co-workers.”  But support isn’t necessarily forthcoming. “Supervisors and co-workers may not empathize with or understand the issues facing the family caregiver and may also feel resentful about increasing workloads placed on them as a result of the lack of work focus and any unplanned absences the caregiver takes.”

“On the plus side, work can help caregivers by providing them with a respite and putting them in a situation in which they feel competent,” Wagner says. That’s important, because many caregivers believe they’re not doing a good job caring for an elderly relative, which makes them feel frustrated. “Being at work can provide a counterbalance to these feelings,” she points out.

Regular contributor Linda Rao writes about health and senior issues for many national publications.

5 Practical Steps To Manage At Work

To help you better balance your caregiving and work responsibilities, the National Family Caregivers Association offers these tips.

  1. If you work for a company with 50 or more employees, ask your human resource department or supervisor to provide you with complete information regarding benefits you are entitled to under the Family and Medical Leave Act.
  2. When talking with your employer about your situation, explain that you need some flexibility because of your family caregiving responsibilities. Have a plan for making up time or meeting deadlines. Whatever arrangements are put in place need to work for everyone involved.
  3. Request clarification, in writing, of your company’s sick leave and vacation policy and which of the two you can apply toward the time off you need to deal with family members you care for.
  4. Keep an emergency contact list with you at work that contains information, doctors, and resources you may need to call to make those personal calls as efficient—and short—as possible.
  5. Compile a list of people you can rely on to call and cover for you at home, in the case you can’t leave the workplace.

To Learn More
Check out these organizations for additional information and support.

AARP
601 E Street NW
Washington, DC 20049
888-687-2277
www.aarp.org

Children of Aging Parents (CAPS)
P.O. Box 167
Richboro, PA 18954
800-227-7294
www.caregiver.org

National Alliance for Caregiving
4720 Montgomery Lane
5th Floor
Bethesda, MD 20814
www.caregiving.org

National Family Caregivers Association
10400 Connecticut Avenue
Suite 500
Kensington, MD 20895-3944
800-896-3650
www.thefamilycaregiver.org

» Advertisement «