Better Health & Living
The Best Advice
Caregivers share their coping tips
Published in family •caregiving | 0 Comments, Talk about this article »
When you want to know something, ask someone in the know. That’s what we did, and longtime care-givers told us how they nurtured themselves as they cared for loved ones. Here are some of the most helpful suggestions.
Just Be Together
Looking back, while I was caring for my husband, I wish I had done more for myself. Various friends offered to do things, and I turned them down. I did hire someone to clean our home, and I think she saved my sanity. I think the most important thing I did was sit outside with my husband and watch the sunset. Not only was it relaxing, it allowed us to be husband and wife for that moment, rather than cared-for and caregiver.
Use the E-Mail Lifeline
I cared for my husband when he was treated for leukemia at hospitals far from our home. A saving grace for me was staying connected with family and friends, to whom I sent long, detailed e-mails. The next day, when I logged on, there were always lots of messages, which were a huge comfort to both of us. I felt the love and support travel across the miles. Each e-mail message felt like another knot in a huge safety net our family and friends had woven beneath us.
Have a Good Cry
When my mother had Alzheimer’s, I found relief when I cried when I was alone or with friends. I also took long walks by myself every day, just listening to music. When I got home, I felt rejuvenated and ready to take on the world.
Focus on a Hobby
I cared for my mother, who had Parkinson’s. I nurtured myself by horseback riding, which often took incredible focus. Riding allowed me to tune out the rest of the world for a while. And because I was raised in the Quaker faith, I received early training in sitting quietly and meditating on the beauty of my surroundings.
Get Some Exercise
When I visit my sister, who’s struggling with a nerve problem, I make sure to get out of the house, even if for only a half hour, and go for a walk. The exercise feels great and relieves my stress.
Plan Something Fun
My two sisters and I have been caring for my mother for more than two years, and she now requires 24-hour care. Although I work 40 hours a week, I’m with my mother about 32 hours a week. My husband and I go to the movies or to dinner alone or with friends on Saturdays. We also plan something for our Sundays together; having something definite to look forward to really helps.
Try Shopping Therapy
When my husband was becoming increasingly debilitated by ALS, I treated myself to occasional shopping trips. I would go to a local mall to buy things or just look around. It got me out of the house and away from the stress for a while.
Connect with a Higher Power
I took care of my wife for several months while she was rehabilitating after a serious automobile accident. I tried to stick to my regular morning routine as much as possible, which was made easier because my wife could walk on her own. Four or five days a week, I’d go to earl-morning Mass. The peace and ritual of the service helped me keep the perspective I needed to get through the stress of caregiving.
Keep Your (Other) Job
When I cared for my mother, who had dementia, my eight children and a cousin helped a great deal. I was able to continue working part-time outside the home, which helped keep me sane.
Regular contributor Linda Rao has written about health, fitness, and caregiving for many national magazines.
Related Articles
Well-Deserved Breaks
Posted by Linda RaoHelping Children With Special Needs
Posted by Linda RaoLegal Briefs
Posted by Linda RaoThe Reluctant Caregiver
Posted by Linda RaoThe Hospice Option
Posted by Linda Rao
» Advertisement «